


A Murder is About to Occur

by kyo_chan



Category: Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015)
Genre: Gen, Hartwin, if you sqint, subtle nod to
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-17
Updated: 2015-06-17
Packaged: 2018-04-04 19:31:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4150080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kyo_chan/pseuds/kyo_chan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Merlin has another test for the Kingsman recruits. This one isn't what anyone expects, especially Eggsy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Murder is About to Occur

**Author's Note:**

> Every week, I meet with a local writers group (which puts up with a lot of my fandom writings), and we start our meetings off with a writing exercise. Ten minutes, a prompt, go. This week, we had a choice between a really serious one that would have had a lot of feels, and then, I'm sure, one that was supposed to be a gag/throwaway. While I wasted precious minutes brainstorming for the serious one, the Eggsy muse hit me with inspiration for the throwaway. It's not really so throwaway anymore... I'm actually plotting out the follow up of Harry finding that paper.

Merlin's voice was conversational as he stood at the head of the classroom.

“Make a list of everyone who’s irritated you. Circle one. A murder is about to occur.”

Eggsy’s list wasn’t very long. In the grand scheme of things, it took a lot to really cross him. Surely this was another kind of test, and he either would have looked like a saint or a kiss-ass if he didn’t write anyone down. Unfortunately, he would also look like a big fat liar, and on top of that, he just didn’t have it in him to be nice. At the top of his list, ‘Dean Anthony Baker,’ and when he wrote it down, he heard the name in Harry’s voice, the sheer threat in his tone when he saved Eggsy’s life. Eggsy could have stopped there, but once his pen started moving, his hand seemed to have a mind of its own. Poodle, the fat bastard who sat around and looked at his mum like a piece of meat, waiting to see if Dean would throw him the scraps. Rotty, the skinny prick with the fancy car, who couldn’t really fight, but he was never alone for Eggsy to prove it. Five more names went down, the main set of cronies Dean used to do his dirty work. There was no question; he circled Dean’s name.

He sat back when he put his pen down, staring. _A murder is about to occur._ Was it really possible? Was that something Kingsman did? A milestone of getting this far in the ‘interview’, to take care of the worst problem of one’s life, whether they failed or passed? All his instincts told him no, it was too good to be true. But for a moment, the hope burned like acid in his chest, and he didn’t realize he was glowering at the list, at that single circled name.

“Done?” Merlin made his rounds, peering curiously to see if his recruits had done his task, though not particularly lingering to see what was written down. “You’re going to kill the person you circled.” Eggsy sucked in his breath, and a murmur worked its way through the others. He caught Roxy’s gaze, and while she had an excellent poker face, it was clear to him she was appalled.  “I’ll bet you’re all wondering how.”

Eggsy was on the edge of his seat.

“You’re going to take that piece of paper and fold it in quarters. Tonight, you do whatever you want to with it. Rip it to pieces, bring it to the range and put a bullet in it, throw it in the fire place, run it over with the taxi – but don’t tell Arthur I said you could do that.”

“The fuck is the point of that?” Charlie demanded, crossing his arms.

Under any other circumstances, Eggsy would have teased the other recruit about running out of paper for people that annoyed him. But he felt such a loathing contempt for his own list sitting peacefully before him, as if it embodied Dean and all the pain he caused Eggsy and his mum. He didn’t think it could ever be enough, any of those things. It was still just a piece of paper. What _was_ the fucking point?

“Becoming a Kingsman is to elevate yourself above this. Kill the memory they hold over you, all the hate you just scribbled out and thought for a moment about killing, and get fucking rid of it.” Merlin’s eyes narrowed, and he looked at each of them in turn. “Did you really think we would kill someone you wrote down just because you said they were bad? Someone who may have harmed you or just irritated you at the supermarket, maybe cut you off in traffic? Anyone you would have written down is not worth throwing away your future just to end theirs. If you would take a life so easily, then it was never worth you setting foot through these doors. No. You’re letting it go. Tonight, you let it go and you come back to me tomorrow with nothing holding you back. That, recruits, is when you’ll fly. Dismissed.”

Eggsy resisted the urge to crumple up the paper and throw it at Merlin’s head instead, everything in him raging. But he was the last one to leave the room, staring for a few moments longer before reaching out. With shaking hands, he folded his pain into four, perfect quarters, and carried it out with him.


End file.
